5 Ways To Defeat Self-Pity

Drowning in self-pity is easy, especially when we measure ourselves against what society and media states we should achieve, and look like and how we live our lives.

I have felt pangs of self-pity when comparing my life to others around me who “had it easy” with all the good things falling into their lap and often asked “why not me?” The truth is my life is pretty good but the more I compare the worse I feel about myself.

Let us consider ways to overcome self-pity and to enable us to appreciate the good in our life.

1. Stop comparing yourselves to others – You don’t know how hard someone has worked for what they have in their lives. Because you do not have what they have does not mean you are less deserving than they are or will never achieve your own success. You need to craft your own path to success and work hard toward that goal.

2. Find things in your life to be grateful for – Shift your attitude to one that is more appreciative of the good things you have in your life. At the beginning and end of the day think of at least one thing for which you are grateful.

3. Evaluate the emotions that arise while you are experiencing self-pity. You may feel lonely, frustrated or worthless. This is the time when you have to say to yourself I am worthy and deserving of love and the best in life. The next step is to love you and refuse to settle for anything less than you are worth.

4. Exercise – Exercise helps us feel better about ourselves through the release of endorphins. Additionally, as we see physical goals set in the exercise whether it is weight-loss or gaining muscle tone or fitness, we develop confidence in our own ability to achieve other objectives.

5. Volunteer – Spend some time at the local Salvation Army, retirement home or other similar place helping those less fortunate than you. This may help you realise how many things you have to be grateful for. Also, helping others helps us feel great as we are making someone’s life easier or better.

Self-pity is an addictive emotion and it is easy to keep feeling sorry for ourselves. However, dwelling in self-pity is not a constructive means of dealing with our emotions or the setbacks that we can experience in our lives. Therefore, take steps such as those outlined above to overcome self-pity and focus on achieving the goals we set for ourselves.